Archive for July, 2013

I got eHugs



Yes, today I got eHugs on my posts about Lixo’s demise. Thank you all so much, it means a lot to me.

As I often do when I’m hitting on a new topic, I google it, and this is what popped up, k?

I don’t actually use google, I stopped using google about three months ago, I found a way around it and their nasty ways. Google is just a verb to me.

Sunny, dry, cool day again and it will be chilly going to work in the evening, decidedly colder when I come home.

This cold snap we had has played havoc with crops. Up to 50% of the wheat crops of Parana have been hit badly, the price of flour is already skyrocketing; as did milk last week with the price of grain feed for cattle. So Brazilians are going to pay dearly for this non-existent global warming. Tell it to the skeptics.

Again a day in which not much happened. I did the dishes twice; first before lunch, then after lunch.

World hero Bradley Manning has been found guilty, and is due to be sentenced. I doubt the sentence will include the Medal of Honor, it should. The government say he was spying, perhaps he was, but then the government shouldn’t have been doing anything spyable; who is the greater criminal?

I have discovered a secret, the internet is truly a font of good information.





Nice Nap

A Little Wooden God

A Little Wooden God

What a pleasant way to spend an afternoon after lunch. Lunch was a bit heavy, a biiig hamburger steak, fried mashed potatoes and stewed tomatoes, a bit savoury, my mouth feels as dry as a little wooden god, similar to the one shown.

Ever wondered where this phrase originated?

Just found out it is of Australian English origin, with no real point of origin.

I had always assumed that it may have been of a ‘Rudyard Kipling’ type origin in his poetry about India, but no such glamour.

So, extrapolating on the idea, little wooden gods must have been made at some time in antiquity, therefore the wood would be very dry.

My morning student rang last night and  canceled classes for the next two weeks, so I have some small reprieve from my split day schedule, which was rather tiring. So I can get about with life, rather like a normal person.

I found this….

Steam Punk Locomotive BBQ

Steam Punk Locomotive BBQ

Want one!

So far, I have the hat.

Not much, but it’s a start. STOP sniggering!

Just think, I’d never have to use that rusty old wheel rim BBQ again; anyway, I can’t, it’s broken. On the weekend I had to borrow the botequim BBQ.

I can’t remember whether I had anything specific to say today, at least I didn’t write myself any cryptic notes.

The day is sunny, but cool again. It will be chilly by the time I leave for work at 5pm. The nights are cold, I have never slept in so much in Brazil before, two T-shirts, two tracksuit pants and two blankets.

We’re still getting poped on the news; I don’t know which has become more tiresome, him or the nasty little dog that is yapping next door?

Must away and desmellify ready for work.



Expect the Unexpected

insanityThat was the case yesterday… twice!

Firstly, this blog received more than 740 hits from the same Canadian IP over the period of an hour. I fully suspect it was something malicious, and it totally screwed up my stats.

Secondly, I decided to have lunch in the park. The local football club had used the botequim BBQ and it was still hot, so I added some more charcoal and used the sirloin and pork ribs that I had in the fridge. I marinated the meat in beer, and drank the rest while the smell of BBQing wafted around the area. I soon had more people around, more beer, two bottles of wine and a very pleasant five hour lunch with friends, totally impromptu.

The advantage of a BBQ is less dishes to contend with.

Did I not suggest that the pope would be interviewed on TV… He was, the interview was aired last night after his departure. I missed it, because by eight o’clock all I wanted was bed. But I got the replays over lunch today.

My students have both cancelled for the evening, so I am sorely tempted to follow the smells of another BBQ at the botequim… which would suggest it may well be beer o’clock.

May as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb.

Ever wondered about where that saying came from?




RIP, my friend


It was confirmed last night, Lixo was poisoned and found dead along the road.

He was about two years old, and gave me two years of happiness, and a few scratches.

He was a constant companion, I couldn’t so much as poo without him, and as a faithful toilet attendant, he never expected a tip, just a good scratch behind the ears.

He was dumped in the praça, along with another kitten, when he was about eight weeks old. The owner of the botequim saw a guy drive up and get a sack from the trunk and empty two kittens in the bushes like rubbish and drive away.

It was the next night I saw him in the bar, and after a petting he followed me home where I fed him and plonked him on the spare sofa. He decided to stay. I named him Lixo, because lixo is Portuguese for rubbish; one man’s rubbish is another man’s treasure.

Lixo was a treasure.





boil-waterWhile I was making coffee this morning I poured boiling water over my left hand, which is not an auspicious way to start the day.

I had already managed to get my flipflops on the right feet while not falling out of bed, I managed not to pee on the floor, nor bump into furniture on my way to the kitchen.

It’s rare that I have kitchen accidents, but when I do, I do it properly. Despite running cold water over the area, my hand still feels the heat.

So with Saturday well on the way, I bring you this post. I have no idea of what I am about to post, you could say it’s pot luck.

Short shorts, similar to these

Short shorts, similar to these

I was browsing another blog earlier, some lovely photos; one was of a shapely girl in short shorts. “Yum!” I thought quietly to myself; while I am advancing in age, I still appreciate the finer points that senility hasn’t erased from my memory. Scrolling down further I perused the comments; one was from a lady blogger whose blog I follow, whose comment, “I’d kill to get into those shorts!” was echoed somewhere deep in the recesses of my mind with “Me too, me too…” Although, I tend to think that her passing thought and mine, were at opposite poles.

Reminded me of a gag I posted recently…

I am behooved to measure my modicum. A comment on one of my posts, mentioned “any body with a modicum of intelligence…”left me wondering what is a modicum?

I therefore googled it.


And discovered this. As I am neither a woman, nor pregnant, I feel I needn’t heed the Govt warning. I don’t have a car, but it left me wondering, can a pot of boiling water be likened to ‘machinery’? Which I obviously failed to operate correctly this morning.

Google was singularly unhelpful when I asked ‘How’ to measure a modicum, I so wonder if a 12 inch ruler would be sufficient…

12inchruleIt certainly more than satisfies the dimensions of other parts of my anatomy.

Cat allergy; they have discovered why some people are allergic to cats, major scientific breakthrough should help us solve the world’s problems.

At the moment, I just wish I had a cat, one Lixo in particular to be allergic to. It is now the third day he has been missing. I miss having my face licked at 3am informing me it is time for tickles. I had no-one to trip me up by lying in the middle of the kitchen floor;and I had to poo alone this morning. When one is a cat person, one needs a cat. I am suffering from a feline deficiency.

Carbon, water, pollution have all created scares when it come to the environment. Now they are scaring us with the possibility of the Arctic releasing a methane bubble/s that could cost the world about $60tn, that’s a little more than a teacher makes, in fact than all the teachers make, in fact it’s more than the whole world makes in a year.

Something has to fill the vacuum

Something has to fill the vacuum

Methane bubbles can be pretty big, when they rise to the surface and escape into the atmosphere, something has to fill the hole. Sea water, and anything floating in it or above it (apparently the suction is enormous and could pull low flying aircraft from the sky).

My new Rule No. 1, “don’t fly over methane bubbles.”

The sun is out, then in again, it’s been doing that all morning. At the moment it’s in. The air is cold, but not quite as cold as yesterday.

Google tells me it should look like this

Google tells me it should look like this

I have been living the week under a delusion. I thought this week was beefless; I have been tormenting myself needlessly.

Today for lunch I am making slapdash meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Basically the recipe is a dash of this, a dash of that, slap it in the oven and make gravy.

The local news last night, was 1 minute of a protest against the state governor and 20 minutes of pope, pope, pope… It’s starting to get a tad boring. More popery today, and tomorrow. Thank God he goes home on Monday and we can get on with our lives again.

Time to make meatloaf.



One of the botequim regulars told me that the neighbour’s dog had been found poisoned in the park, and that he had disposed of it and a dead cat as well, no description of the cat. I am waiting for the neighbour to come home to get a description of the cat.

Ever Been Stuck for Words?

That’s me, now.

Took me about five minutes to state the obvious.

guaratibaBrazilian weather doesn’t like the pope. Today a mass involving the 14 stations of the cross was moved from the planned site in Guaratiba to Copacabana. The site in Guaratiba was a quagmire of mud and totally unusable despite R#24 million being spent on the infrastructure, That’s a lot of wasted money.

I have just watched the pomp and ceremony on TV. About 1.5 million people attended in the cold wind; at least there was no rain.

Today was exciting. I napped, I supermarketed, I renapped, I lunched on homemade hamburgers and read the news, again. Between all that activity I managed to post on most blogs.

The sun managed to shine, although it was still bitterly cold.

I hope he's found a comfy blanket

I hope he’s found a comfy blanket

Lixo has disappeared. He’s a Tom cat, so I expect him to be absent overnight and come home when he’s hungry. But this time he has been away for more than 48 hours; I am fearing the worst. The last visit home he wasn’t his usual hungry self, the same symptom that manifested in Meow Meow’s and da Meow’s demise. I fear he has been poisoned. He managed to escape the previous round that claimed two cats and five dogs in the near neighbourhood, but his luck may have run its course.

I sincerely hope that I am being premature, and that he’ll jump through the bars on the door at any moment.

I’m going to leave it her for now.


The Frog has a Name

British papers as as full of royal baby as ours are of the pope

British papers as as full of royal baby as ours are of the pope

Yes, the poor kid has been lumbered with George, if he ever gets to be king, he’ll be George  VII. Not exactly original, his full monicker George Alexander Louis is a grand pandering to about 100% of Europe’s royalty.

Still looks like a frog. Mothers and grannies think they are beautiful, they are lying.

The Queen is thrilled… nice.

It’s stopped raining. The current shower lasted 24 hours, it stopped about five minutes ago. Still bloody cold. I am in tracksuit pants, two T-shirts (one is long-sleeved) and socks with my flipflops. I slept with two blankets, the second being added shortly after midnight when I woke shivering. Rio de Janeiro is not supposed to be like this. It was so cold last night that the colour drained from my feet AND the TV; I was left watching B&W TV for the evening.



If I showed my dongle to the world, I’d be arrested and called a pervert. But Google can get away with it. Google has shown its dongle to the world. Something to do with cheap television.

Personally I wouldn’t touch it with a barge-pole; it’s another dastardly attempt by google to mine more information about you to sell to advertisers, to direct advertising to all your google apps based on what you watch.

Be assured, Google is not doing this for you. As far as Google is concerned you are just information to sell, you are advertising fodder!

millstone of povertyThe pope has done it!

I thought that this guy had a chance, but he’s blown it. He’s shown to the world that he is as stupid and ill informed as the rest. Warning the world not to legalise drugs, pandering to crime and law enforcement, without even considering the facts.

He says he wants to help the poor, he has just made sure that the millstone of poverty stays firmly fixed around their necks. It is the poor who are hurt most by the illegality of drugs, they are the ones who suffer.

You just have to look at Rio’s situation, where do the drug dealers hang out? The slums! I am sure that Rio is not unique in this scenario.

It’s started to rain again; there goes my chance to get to the supermarket.

Plan B… Don’t go to the supermarket.

I was shocked yesterday. I stopped to speak briefly with a young mother while she was talking to another young mother with a babe in arms. The baby was clearly a thalidomide baby a few months old, its hands extended directly from the shoulders.

thalidomepacketsIt seems that thalidomide has been authorised in Brazil for treating leprosy and while the packaging of the drug warns of birth  defects, the poor don’t have the education to understand the implications.

Just another crime against humanity. Who cares? It was so heartbreaking to see that baby yesterday.

Today is a decreed public holiday in honour of the papal circus, as is tomorrow, and Monday. People jumping through hoops in the rain just to get a glimpse.

I’m off into the wild blog yonder…




Still Looks Like a Frog

All poped out.

royal baby frogRoyal baby, Prince William is proud that his jewels are in fine working order, he finally has a playmate to run nude with around the castle.

The baby looks like any baby, they look like a frog. Trouble is this one will grow up to be a prince without the traditional kiss.

Today is raining… lots. Will be for the rest of the popes visit. Now if that isn’t an omen…

Last lesson over for the day, ate a dead shark for lunch; the live ones are tricky, they tend to bite back. Next five days… blogging.


I may update later, right now, it’s nap time.

Too Cold for Bonking

Yes, Lixo is inside tonight, sleeping soundly on my clean clothes. It’s too cold to foray outside in search of love.

Brazil is suffering a mass of polar air over the south of the country that has bought snow to more than 80 cities as far north as Curitiba. Some of these cities haven’t seen snow since the 1940s.

pope1Pope, pope, pope… The news is full of the Pope.

So far the Pope has got lost, red faces everywhere ducking for cover. The popemobile complete with pope got caught in a traffic jam with buses.

The pope has kissed a baby.

Today the pope is resting.

Amusing to note that the political figures in Rio were proud of the money they had personally put up for the big pope party last night. I heard one figure of R$800,000, but it was all for nothing. Pope Francis true to form in renouncing riches, snubbed the party and left after the official bits were over. Leaving the political figures with bloodied noses. When I heard this, I laughed my socks off. Bunch of wankers!

I have now calculated the damages; I lose R$295.50 in wages because of this papal fiasco.

I was asked today by a devout Catholic about my views of the pope, I informed him that I wouldn’t walk across the road to see him. He was shocked beyond belief. I have the same view of any famous personage, politician, president, film star… I’d snub the bloody lot. Far too much bullshit in this world; not enough sharing and caring.

He was even further shocked when I asked him why we are here. His response to worship god was of course predictable. The moment of shock came when I negated his answer and said we are here to provide good compost and mulch for the planet.

An ignoble end, but that’s it; our destiny, regardless of our riches or poverty, is to compost the planet, just the same as the biggest animal, the prettiest flower, or the lowliest worm.

That was the end of the argument, he agreed that I had won the debate. Especially when I made the point that I would get closer to heaven regardless of differences in our piety, because I was fatter than he and therefore able to provide more compost.

I love teasing the devout.

News is about to start; can’t miss more pope, pope, pope…



To Fly in the Face of Convention

17963910Oh how uptight we have become as beings. We have become so prudish, so scared of ourselves in all manner of unbelievable ways.

This post was inspired by a post Liberating on Angie’s Grapevine.

Angie went outside in her unmentionables much to the horror of her daughter.

My immediate thought was “I do that!” so what? I’ve actually been outside in less, in a cowardly brief excursion to the washing line.

Convention has us so bound up that we’re too scared to poop mentally.

I certainly am not conventional, I sleep naked, no sheet in the summer, just the lovely fan. Pyjamas are a waste of material. I pee in the shower, why waste water on a flush, when you’ve got water going down the drain any way.

I’m not afraid to fly in the face of convention!

The Pope arrives today. 4pm. I wonder what TV host will have him on his show, will it be the exceedingly boring Faustão, the disorganised rabble of Esquentão, or Calderão do Huck? Or will he just be quietly dissected by our bland friend Jô Soares?

Brazil has the habit that any personality, famous, mundane or of absolutely no general interest at all gets to do the rounds of all the TV shows.

Does the Pope do TV shows? He should, it would enhance his popularity enormously. Or does he just do St Peter’s Square? He needs a front man.

My pee smells funny. I had forgotten that side effect of asparagus…

Found this; a cat with attitude.

dogsbumflowerI think that’s just wonderful. It could happen on any Monday…

Yes, here we go, it’s Monday; Pope week. Disruptions, nothing at all important on the news, lost students, days off aplenty. Today, the holiday doesn’t begin until 4pm. Then it’s back to normal for Tuesday and Wednesday, then four days off…. and the really disturbing aspect of all that is that it will be Monday again!

You can’t escape them, you know.



Beware the Royal Baby! and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!”

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