Tag Archive: blogging


Angry, Birds

Different angry birds

Different angry birds

No, no, not these angry birds.

Angry & Birds

I am angry at the birds. They keep eating my guava off the tree.

I know a guava is ripe because it turns yellow, if I wait for them to turn yellow, the birds have already started to eat them on the cusp between green and yellow.

It’s hard to win.

The early bird gets the guava, bugger the worms.

I’m not even going to mention that game played by men with the round balls…

Except to say that today is our day to beat Germany.

I have red, white and bubbly in the fridge. Chilean Cab Sav & Chardonnay, and Italian (didn’t have any German) Lambrusco Bianco, it’s not exactly bubbly, rather Frizzante.

ghost-rider-2007I watched a sequel to Ghost Rider last night, what a load of rubbish. Sequels are never as good as the original.

Left me dog tired at 1am and terribly disappointed.

I was awake again at 3am.

I finally woke up at 7:45, 7:55, 8:05 and 8:15…

Yes, I was reluctant to get out of bed.

Clorinha, however, wasn’t and was demanding breakfast.

She got her breakfast and I got my first coffee of the day, then my second, then my third. It was about then that I was ready to face the day.

I didn’t do a full blog load yesterday, and due to the inevitable nap, today is a sequel; never as good as the first.

It’s now after three, I have denapped and had more coffee. I have fish defrosted, so guess what’s for lunch; which will only happen when I finish here.

I haven’t even read the news today. It’s quite possible that the world has ended, and I don’t even know about it. Although, from the noise that’s coming from the botequim, I doubt it. Much merriment.

That’s where I’ll be after lunch, participating in the merry-making. I will drink wine, and that’ll make me merry.

So, I’m off to particificate… guavaless.

Later.

 

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M.I.A.

OMG! It’s 6pm!

I’ve done it before, and apparently, I’ve done it again.

Today started off okay twelve hours ago, that was when evrything went wrong.

Coffee was okay, even the second, then I discovered that I’d forgotten to leave the keys for work at work last night.

Never before was this so applicable

Never before was this so applicable

I began to fret, and after some work here (real work, not blogging) I had to take the keys back before someone (the bossette) discovered that I really was an idiot.

Now, I am ready to resume my responsibility and blog along. There is an internet connection problem and it’s as slow as a wet week  and comes and goes. At the moment, it’s gone again, making my endeavours very painful indeed.

Well, it’s now after 9:00 pm. It’s taken me three hours to get this far. It appears that the connection has settled down.

Okay, on with today’s woes.

Having taken the keys back to work, I was half way to the supermarket, so I walked the rest of the way.

Good move? No bad move. I had forgotten that today was Wednesday. Supermarkets have their meat specials on Wednesdays; oh poo! The place was packed with dedicated shoppers. Navigating was nigh on impossible, but I managed and eventually got to the checkout. All the checkouts had long lines. I got into one. Two laden trolleys in front; then when the next woman began putting her shopping on the checkout, she pulled two more laden trolleys that were on the side into line; she had three trolleys and she seemed to take a sadistic delight in being as slow as possible.

The next guy was mercifully quick, then my turn.

Finally I got home; three hours later.

End of the story… oh no.

They has just fired up the BBQ at the botequim.

When one is invited to participate, it’s rather churlish to refuse. I hurriedly put away my shopping, grabbed some smoked sausage and Coalho cheese kebabs to add to the offerings and went next door.

That’s where I spent the next three hours and three beers.

End of the story… oh no.

Had to have a nap, and that’s where I spent the next three hours.

A coffee, and that’s where I came in at the top of the post. I have been M.I.A. Not a blog post done for the day.

Talk about a day wasted. Mind you, I could have wasted it watching football, but there were no games today. Nor tomorrow, I wonder how I can waste the day tomorrow?

So it is with heavy heart that I will blog along.

Later.

 

The bastards, the bloody bastards!

Sorry, I’m going to start of with a real bitch this morning.

These two girls face having their vaginas and clitorises brutally cut out without anaesthetic

Remember the story I have been following of the Nigerian woman and her two daughters being deported?

Well, the bastards did it!

She was deported yesterday back to Nigeria where her daughters will almost  certainly be made to undergo FGM. The reason she escaped Nigeria in the first place was because her step-mother had already threatened that the older girl should be ‘cut’.

If these girls are ‘cut’, ALL those responsible for this horrific decision from the Home Secretary down should be prosecuted under British law for aiding and abetting FGM. Then publicly castrated! Although the Home Secretary doesn’t have any balls in whatever sense of the phrase.

I am bloody disgusted!

This woman came to a ‘civilised’ country for refuge, and she was thrown back to the wolves, ‘civilised’ I use that term loosely.

All those involved in the decision have broken British law against FGM.

Next bitch…

NSA have been collecting your photos off social media sites to assist with facial recognition.

Next bitch…

I read of a charity that is raising money to drill a well for water into an aquifer. This is the current problem in the world, we are using non-renewable water. Aquifers are the back-up for the river and lake water we are already using; they take hundreds of years to replenish. Once it’s gone, it’s gone for a very long time.

Next bitch…

Britain is having a problem with extremism in culturally based schools; 21 Islamic schools are under investigation.

Cultural schools should be banned. If you choose to live in another country, then you abide by the education system in that country. Segregation of boys and girls in the classroom, with the girls being made to sit at the back, is not acceptable.

Next bitch…

Sprinkles, an emergency. Images from BBC News

How stupid can you get? A woman in Britain dialed 999 because the icecream man put sprinkles on one side, but not on the other side of her icecream.

No more bitches, at the moment.

Really the world is going nuts!

Lovely cool sunny day out there, no classes. I may just go to the supermarket, not because I am out of food, but just for the excursion.

No more misplaced poops, but a little chunder on the carpet. It was a cold night, Clorinha found the warmest spot in the house and slept on top of me for the night.

Need more coffee, then it’s blogging right along.

Later.

Debloggerficated

Collapsed in a big heap; but I did make it to bed

Collapsed in a big heap; but I did make it to bed

Yes, that’s how I felt last night when I got home from work; debloggerficated.

My right royal plan was to complete my bloggerfications before bed; I had two to go, here and Eco-Crap. But, alas, it was not to be.

The news finished, I sat here, and I sat here.

I read the news, I sort of read a political blog (Running ‘Cause I Can’t Fly) that I read each evening and by then I was close to collapse.

I did so, in a big heap on the bed.

What a terribly grotty looking cheese, I bet it tastes wonderful

Would you eat this?

I would.

If you want to more about it, check Fromage Friday post.

The blog Fromage Homage is a regular read, it’s about cheese, cheese and more cheese.

I’m sure that in some past life, I had small furry grey genes and the DNA persists today.

I love cheese.

The weekend has started. I’m  coffeed and ready to go. On the agenda today are the supermarket and beer. I’ll ignore the dishes and water the plants.

Lunch is, at this stage, a distant glimmer in the future. It may well depend on what I find in the supermarket; something the lazier, the better.

Half a jar of chilles

Half a jar of chilles

Yesterday I picked my chilli pepper bushes clean and I have enough chillies to fill the jar already started and make more two jars.

My goiabeira (guava tree) has begun a second crop; much more prolific than the first and the fruit seems to be better formed, so I am hopeful of more guava juice.

Clorinha was sitting outside on the window sill in the sun. When I opened the front door, she came rushing inside… just to outside again. Apparently there was some cat-logic involved that escapes me.

I had my first meal with the organic whole rice yesterday. It was good. I had meatballs and leftover fish fillet and homemade tomato sauce on it. Even Clorinha liked it.

Cool, sunny day out there, no rain forecast. The sun is streaming through the window and reflecting on the screen, making it difficult to write, so I’ll finish for now and do something exciting like play Spider…

Later.

 

 

4am Coffee

Yes, there’s nothing like coffee at 4am complete with the aroma of singed knuckle hairs; I was too slow pulling my had back.

You see, I use my old cigarette lighters to light the gas. Once the lighter has run out of gas, the flint still has six months or more use and I refuse to buy these fancy schmancy contraptions to light my stove. Besides, they usually crap out in a couple of months.

4:30am Coffee…

ironman2Can’t sleep, went to bed early, couldn’t sleep then either, got up and watched the start of the Monday night movie. Iron Man 2, ten minutes was enough of that crap and went back to bed after a midnight hamburger.

I resisted the temptation to light the candle behind my screen and blog. I was sorely tempted having been without a connection for 60+ hours. But I stayed strong and steadfast and slept soundly until 4am.

I have a shit-load of emails a lot of fan mail to catch up on, and new posts to read on followed blogs; which I have been doing between coffees. Still got a lot to go.

Being without the net for so long has left me at a loss, I have experienced this before, but got over it eventually. The net was back on when I returned home last night from class.

Normal blogging will resume soon.

Later.

 

Pooh

PoohAnd, I’m not discussing Winnie the Pooh, Christopher Robin nor anything as sweet as Hunny!

I am talking crap!

The kind of crap that happens either in the throne room or on Mondays.

Foregoing the former, and concentrating on the latter; crap happens on Mondays. I have always espoused this theory, and it’s true.

I left home yesterday, everything was fine, PC lights blinking in their friendly comforting manner as I flicked off the screen. It was when I arrived home… the net was down. Probably my fault, probably the PC not wanting to play the game. I spent until 1am trying this and trying that, uninstalling, re-installing. Nothing worked.

I went to bed in a huff.

Morning, nothing had changed. Finally, at 8:01 I rang the service provider… “Anything wrong with the net?” “No, hang on, I’ll check.” Seconds later, “Ah, yes there’s a glitch!”

I shudder each time I ring him, because it’s usually my fault or somewhere in the nether regions of my PC. I was vindicated and I smiled as I clicked off my cellphone.

Seems like it!

Seems like it!

So now it’s nearly 11am, this is the first netty thing I have done, oh this and I quickly read the news.

I have a shitload of work to do, because I didn’t get all my blogging done yesterday.

I don’t really know where to start.

So the sensible thing is to have a nap; then make more coffee.

Later.

I Put my Pants On

I look nothing like this when I am blogging

I look nothing like this when I am blogging

Men get a bad rap. They are known to blog in the underpants.

I am here today to justify that bad rap. I blog in my underpants.

Probably a lot of women are equally guilty of blogging in their knickers, with or without bra.

I am at home alone, I roll out of bed in the morning, I am comfortable as I am; in my underpants. The only detracting side of this is when I splash hot water while making that all essential first morning coffee. Cloro doesn’t mind, although she sometimes looks at me as though to say “OMG, put some fur on!”

I have also been known to go out into the yard dressed like that. I can’t be seen from the road, unless you’re a pervert peeking through the crack in the gate; nor seen by the neighbours unless they are on their roof, read perverts again.

But this morning, I was out in the yard for some time, and I felt a little more secure in more than just my underpants. I had to water the plants, they were gasping in this heat. Yesterday was 37°C and the forecast today is for 40°C (106°F) with low humidity.

Last night I had some delicious sandwiches. I shaved some pork of the left over BBQ leg chop and put the shavings in some bread, a little pepper and salt… The rest is history.

Lunch today will be an exciting affair, leftover spaghetti bolognaise, somehow it always tastes better as a leftover.

A downer…

Sunday night, I resolved, after much procrastination (years of it) to complete a book that I am writing. I started the book in 2003, and have added to it little by little. The book is on advanced advanced English grammar *puts on Grammar Police Cap*, I have reached the 254 page mark, with about another 20+/- pages to be added.

Part of the procrastination was through losing the file on a shitty hard drive, then recovering it on another shitty hard drive, then recovering it again, on pendrive, and two more hard drives, to ensure that I don’t lose it again.

I decided to print off a hard copy of the book for proof reading. I can’t successfully proof read on the screen, I have to have the paper in front of me. Got to page 41, and and Wah! The black cartridge gave out. More procrastination while I get the cartridge refilled. Plans are to do that when I pay the rent tomorrow.

That’s it for today, other than to say, I want a Beamer like this one…

funny-German-car-beerLater.

I think this is a First

9am, and I finished blogging half an hour ago, just here needs a patch. Despite my being a little stewed after yesterday afternoon’s excesses, I managed a full blog-load before midnight. Didn’t I do well? <—– Rhetorical question

awakeupcoffeeI’ve had lots of coffee, and now it’s time for the toast and muffins.

Once again, nothing planned, I should be successful. Although I may/may not go to the supermarket; after yesterday’s binge, eating is not a priority. I can make do with what’s at hand.

I will peer into the fridge later and surprise myself.

I see Prince William and Kate’s baby is imminently due. Apparently the Royal sprog is going to be a boon for British retailers to the order of £250 million, that’s a lot of pounds. David Cameron should be considering a law to keep the Royals pregnant as a boost to the British economy. The Rogering for England Act should become law. Shows how stupid politicians are, that they haven’t thought of this little money spinner before.

A Happy Pussy

A Happy Pussy

Pit Stop… Off to the bog to contemplate life from the throne and give Lixo his morning scratch.

I will return with coffee.

This is called ‘multitasking’, three desired results at the same time; relief, coffee and a happy pussy.

I have discovered the secret of life. It’s somewhat philosophical, I tend to dive into the gene pool occasionally and find pearls of wisdom. One of which I will share with you on this beautiful sunny  Saturday morning. It would be churlish indeed to keep such discoveries to myself.

Have you ever wondered what the plural of ‘bacteria’ is. Of course Americans would say bacterias, but, as usual, they would be wrong. Bacteria is the plural, the singular is bacterium, but when was the last time you needed to speak about one bacterium, they travel in groups so we usually refer to them in the plural.

As my students have noted, I am full of useless information.

Let’s explore the English language a bit further. It’s a strange language.

 

english-true-words

There, didn’t I tell you it was strange…

With that to ponder, I shall leave you and proceed on my doing nothing for the rest of the day.

Later.

 

Careful!

coffeewarningI still looking for my Prozac…

Until I find it, walk slowly back and make no sudden moves.

I don’t actually take that shit, but I needed a cutesy opening line.

I have had my first coffee and being near lunchtime I am about four short of my requirements.

My students arrived before I could pour the second, then I got tangled up reading the news on BBC, then I googled political satire that kept me amused for more than an hour. The remarkable thing about political satire is that it should be ‘political truths’. You can se a sample of what I found on Shit Happens today. Do you like oxymorons? Try this one: honest politicians.

Still no sign of my Mean Green Leaf Eating Machine, however the deforestation in my garden has stopped.

This is my last blog post for the day, I have completed the other seven. Now it seems as if there is no purpose in the rest of the day. I could cancel the afternoon and move straight into Sunday, but beer or wine could also be an attractive option to get over my winexiety. Lunch today, leftovers from yesterday, I’ll spice it up with some cracked black peppercorns.

Brazilians love anything American, Wrangler jeans, music, all sorts of stuff. Now they are following American manufacturing tactics. Big engineering firm here that makes parts for export to America has just moved their manufacturing plant to South Korea where they can make the same part for less than half the cost to compete with the Chinese. Now it’s Brazilian jobs going overseas, just like American jobs.

My stats are continuing to fall. Yes, I know I am whining, but look at this, Nether Region stats from the beginning when I left Blogspot in Sep 2011.

statsNRLook at that dip in November last year and the plummet from February  (26th) this year. This is the trend on all my blogs, not just one. There’s something screwy going on. I am convinced that I have been sabotaged somewhere along the line.

I work hard to produce my blogs and when I see this, it shatters my confidence totally. I know I am not imagining things, it’s not because the world has suddenly lost its sense of humour (Nether Region is a humour blog), or that cooking and drinking have gone out of fashion; even this blog with 100++ visitors a day, now only gets a max of 30. Six of my blogs got 1,000+ visitors a month, now only 2 of them manage to scrape over the finish line. “There’s something rotten in Denmark,” (I didn’t pick the country, William Shakespeare did).

It’s like my blogs are invisible, with the exception of my regular visitors.

Second coffee down, time for lunch.

Later.

Tumucumaque

1tumucumaqueLike the title?

Did you try to say it?

Tumucumaque is a national park established ten years ago in the state of Amapa in the northeast of Brazil.

I had never heard of it before last night when Globo Reporter excelled itself and produced a phenomenal programme, which is a rarity for Brazilian TV.

One of the amazing inhabitants

An amazing place, parts have never seen the footprints of man. During the reportage, just a few days, one biologist identified 70 new species of spider.

Tomorrow’ Nature Ramble on Eco-Crap will have more details.

Three years after being closed, the world famous Maracanã Football Stadium is open today for a friendly match between Brazil’s famous footballers. This is the final shakedown to make sure that everything is working before the international friendly between Brazil and England in June.

Today didn’t go as planned. I decided to have a rest and get some fresh air for the afternoon, something I don’t get enough of, so not a lot of blogging got done. But, I did manage to cut my toenails.

Just as I crossed the road, some friends I hadn’t seen for a while where having a beer in front of the botequim. Churlish to refuse an invitation, so even less blogging got done.

Now I will see if the damage can be repaired…

Later.

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