Tag Archive: guava

A Full Hour into Nap-fu

About this hot

About this hot

And, I was rudely awakened by thunder.

Today started off well, cloudy and cool, then it became an inferno. Dante would have felt at home.

We were promised 36ºC, the highest in the country.

Bt the time I got home from the supermarket, it was 40ish+Cº (106ºF)

I rushed to put the things that required refrigerating into the fridge and went next door to rehydrate for an hour before Nap-fu practice.

The next thing, I am rudely awakened by thunder.

I sincerely hope it rains, and rains a lot, because the plants in the praça need it badly.

They tell us there is no inflation. I paid my bill at the botequim… 2xbeer, 3xsmall bottles of soda (for the kids) and 2x cigarettes. I proffered R$25. Raimundo apologised when he gave me a miserable 35 centavos change.

Well, easy come, easy go as the saying goes.

beamazingI feel like I should be doing something amazing.

But in this heat it is hard.

Unless, you count the dishes and watering the plants.

I just poked my nose out the gate to investigate the noise, the kids are barefoot in the street dancing on the asphalt to avoid the heat. Another negative for our new asphalted street. The old parallelapipado (cobblestones) never got hot like that.

At least it will be a little cooler when I have to go to work at 6pm, and there will be some shade along the way.

Tonight is Halloween.

Happy Halloween!

In the silly box today… Britain. They are talking about putting calories on wine and beer, etc in an effort to combat obesity. The fools. Ban all forms of soda that use HFCS, is the amswer. How do I know this? I have given up all Coca Cola and shit in favour of sparkling mineral water. I still drink beer and wine. The weight is dropping off. Yes, another silly idea by politicians. They really are a bunch of wankers.

After tens of thousands took to the street on Tuesday regalling the internet tax in Hungary, they’ve dropped the idea. I guess they realised it wasn’t popular.

Chile has become the latest country to move marijuana laws. It is now pemitted to grow medicinal cannabis.

The music stinks too

The music stinks too

Next week Rio is playing host to Skank, a Brazilian band… the way they pronouce Skank in Portuguese it sounds like sunk.

They expect thousands to enjoy the smell music.

Today at the botequim, a young lad entered with his shorts at halfmast showing off his underwear as is the current craze. When he spoke to me, I told him that when he learns to wear his clothes properly, I’ll talk to him…

And I wonder why they call me a velho caduco (grumpy old man). I hate that.

Britain is paying off some of its debt… wait for it… for WW I.

My guava trees are blossoming like crazy.

Laden with blossoms

Laden with blossoms

Keeping the little fruit bees busy as… well, bees. These flowers I took yesterday are already dead ready to produce little guava.

It’s 4pm, I have a couple of blogs to post on before work, so I will move right along.


Got Too Physical

Funny-meme-Monday-will-be-over-soonAnd, now I am suffering. I’ve got a sore back, all that carpentry over the weekend, and again this morning. I made a new shelf for under the kitchen sink. It even hurts to reach over the keyboard. So this post comes with suffering, blood, sweat and tears.

Nothing much to report, my student rang, she’s left her books at home, so the lesson is cancelled for today… Pheeew!

Been sunny up till now, it’s just darkened. We had a change of weather yesterday with a lot of wind and a little rain over night.

Just finished lunch. Slapdash! Slapped some chicken cubes in the pot, sloshed in some mustard and soya sauce, diced up some celery and cooked some rice. Done!

I mentioned that our street had new carpet.


New carpet

Originally it was parallelapipados (cobblestones), and looked like this.



But they got patchy and it was a mess. It was also a natural traffic barrier, and most cars passed carefully. Now that is nice and smooth, they think they’re Formula 1 drivers. This is making it dangerous for the kids crossing to the praça. Our stretch is particularly notorious for kids crossing without looking.

Ellen Suelen, my stepdaughter used to do this…

Ellen Suelen siting in a tree, k.i.s.s.i.n.g, no eating guava!

Ellen Suelen sitting in a tree, k.i.s.s.i.n.g, NO eating guava!

Mum could never find the paring knife, any wonder.

Now she’s grown up, she doesn’t sit in the tree wearing just her panties anymore. But when she arrived on Saturday for the BBQ, first thing she did was to pull down a branch of my tree and pluck off a couple of guava.

Ellen Suelen doesn't sit in the guava tree anymore

Ellen Suelen doesn’t sit in the guava tree anymore

Mum tells me there is another problem, boys are hanging off the gate by the dozen drooling teenage hormones.

*Dad oils up the shotgun*

No need really, Ellen’s opinion of boys is that they’re a hinderance.

A few years ago our blonde bimbo president said that Brazil was protected from the decline in the global economy after the 2008 crash. At the time I cried bullshit! Last quarter Brazil went into a recession… and guess what? The blonde bimbo is blaming the global decline. I had to laugh.

Looks like she won’t be president for much longer. With the death of Eduardo Campos in the plane crash and Marina da Silva stepping into his shoes, her party went from struggling to make double figures in the polls 8, 9, 10% to 34% within a week; which puts her dead level with the incumbent.

Mine's not that bad!

Mine’s not that bad!

I am all for Marina, she’s probably the most honest politician in Brazil. But I have misgivings about her being an evangelical, therefore against abortion and same sex marriage. She could take Brazil backward in these areas.

It doesn’t particularly concern me, I’m not about to have an abortion (it’s a beer belly), nor am I about to marry a bloke.

But she is right on the ball to make Brazil the greenest country in the world, and she’s no slug went it comes to the economy either.

I see that celebrities are concerned after nude photos were leaked from cloud storage sites. Confirming my opinion that cloud storage is a disaster waiting to happen and  isn’t safe. If they don’t want their nudes photos spread across the planet, don’t take them.

A Briton has been jailed for six years after killing the arsehole that stole his son’s iPhone at knife point. The father went looking for him armed with a knife, and after being blinded by the assailant’s knife in one eye, he stabbed him. While this wasn’t the correct way to resolve the matter, he should have called the police. But I am of the opinion that the world is one arsehole less. Turns out he had ten previous armed assaults, he should never have been on the streets; he was too dangerous. No sympathy from this quarter.

Here’s my parting shot for the day!

‘Half of state school teachers face pupil aggression’ Headlines from BBC News.

This situation has been getting progressively worse, and it will not stop here.

Kick the aggressors out of the school system, don’t give them benefits, they shit in their own nest; make them realise that. Make them labour for their living, if they turn to crime, lock the door and throw away the key.

Grumpy old bastard, aren’t I?

Ah, that’s a rhetorical question.



Sneering and Jeering

Just thought you should know…

No, nothing about football.

I walked into the kitchen and sneered at the dishes. The damned things sneered back. So I washed them and hid them in the cupboards. Cheeky blighters!

While I was making a snack, cold corned beef sandwich, Clorinha was doing the meow-I’m-starving act, so I threw a bit of gristle and meat on the floor. Eaten. Okay, another piece, only sniffed at it.

I left it on the floor, too lazy to bend down and eventually stood on it later.

Clorinha came in sniffed at it and ate it. Standing on it must have made it more flavourful… some how.

I beat the kids, I got another guava!

Later, again.

See sometimes when I say later, I mean it. 🙂

The prestigeous 5 kilos of gold

The prestigious 5 kilos of gold

The day after, soul-searching, nursing severely bruised egos…

Not since 1920 has Brazil been so humiliated, Uruguay 6 – Brazil 0; mind you, Brazil did a 7 – 1 to Switzerland once.

After the game yesterday, even God cried; it rained as soon as the game finished..

At least we didn’t suffer the humiliation of being sent home… we’re already there.

And, it’s not our last game. Brazil plays the losers of today’s Holland vs Argentina game for a somewhat ignoble third place.

Nothing beats the glory of holding that 5 kilos of gold aloft.

I have been moping… and I’m not even a real Brazilian, so I imagine how they feel, I feel their pain, I share it. I haven’t even done the dishes, nor blogged, nor read the news, but I did have a wonderful nap.

LikebuttonI have a heap of comments to reply to, and I thank all those who took the time to share my sorrow, and visit bloggers who took their time to click my ‘Like’ button. I will get round to it today, promise.

Today marks a return to normal; class tonight, pay my net bill, and buy some bread to make supper tonight after class.

Another cool sunny day, rescued a guava, fell off the bucket doing so. Left me clutching the gate for dear life. I returned to the kitchen for another coffee to settle rattled nerves. I know, I should invest in a ladder instead of using an upturned bucket, but then I would have only fallen from higher.

Lunch has been had; homemade fish bites leftover from yesterday.

Blogging right along…


I wonder what Cruel will use against the Argentinians? He’ll need stronger medicine than just psyching tem out; maybe…


My Bum’s Wet

One lonely little goiaba

One lonely little goiaba

No, no photos…

I was out watering my plants and the split in the hose sent water right up my shorts leg. One day I’ll fix it.

My little goiaba branca (white guava) that I didn’t expect to fruit until next year, has done it. One lonely little goiaba.

I have just picked two off the other tree, so lunch will involve suco de goiaba (guava juice). There, that’s part of the menu fixed. I have just peered into the cavernous depths of my fridge; looks like spring rolls again. Yesterday rolls were actually curried rolls with feijão (black bean) leftovers. I believe in utilising all I have. Today, I’ll fry up a bit of cabbage, grated carrots cooked in garlic and parsley.

140404-mcdonalds-RussianThe Russian take over of Crimea has caused a crisis in more ways than political.

McDonald’s has closed its three Crimean outlets.

The Crimeans will have to resort to real food.

Not closed for good, unfortunately, rather suspended operations because of instability.

Putin’ it bluntly, Russia is creating a bit of mess.

Twitter-turkeyTurkish High Court has ruled that the prime minister’s Twitter shut down is against the constitution. He is fuming, having avowed to shut social media down, his efforts have been thwarted and he has all the little Twitter birds shitting all over him.

I find it all rather amusing really. As much as I dislike social media generally, the rabid politicians are fighting it in time-honoured methods of suppression. They have got no idea how to use the social media. They ban it, and they simply make a bigger noise that backfires. Today’s politicians are techno-dinosaurs, which is not surprising as their methods are prehistoric.

There is the old adage that bad news travels fast, well today, it travels even faster. When politicians do, as they have always done, run a corrupt system, the shit gets flung further, wider and faster than ever before. And the funny thing is, you can’t stop it.

The transparency that social media brings to politics is good.

xbox-360-limited-edition-halo-reach-bundle-controllerChild’s play: A five-year-old in San Diego has found a flaw in X-Box. He was able to log into his father’s account without the password.

His father sent the details to Microsoft and the flaw has now been fixed.

They paid the kid off with $50 (£30), four free games.

Bloody cheapskates. That flaw could have cost them hundreds of thousands in litigation and more in lost product.

Ebola is on the go. Cases reported initially on Guinea, have now popped up in Mali, Liberia and Sierra Leone. This is a very serious situation, how long before the virus appears in Europe or the Americas?

The Americans are now finding out what a horrible little man GWB really was. The Senate has been shocked by the report of torture carried out by the CIA under Bush, and many are crossing the floor to have the report released to the public.

I’ve done it again, missed the news…

Time for lunch.



It Came!

Yesterday cooking lunch, I went outside to cut some parsley, and there was a fine mist. I looked to the sky, was this the rain we were promised?


The barrier between the linesman and the goal was published in O Globo as a joke, that barrier wasn’t there. But it was a goal.

After the football, I came home from the botequim, cool, but still no sign of rain. Flamengo won against Vasco 2-1, but the game was marred by terrible referee and linesman decisions, one which robbed Vasco of their first goal. Everybody in the stadium knew, but the ref wouldn’t allow it; even the linesman who was right on top of the goal ‘didn’t see it’.

All the officials at the game need to be recycled.

The Blushing Agave (yesterday’s post) was a success, even the second try with Cherry Brandy was better than the first.

At 7:45, the rain started and finished in ten minutes. The just after 8:00 it started in earnest, and rained heavily throughout the night. We got our rain.

Today has been cool and partly cloudy with the sun shining through, we are expecting more rain tonight.

suco-de-goiabaI had my first home-grown suco de goiaba (guava juice) last night.

Three guava were ripe enough to make a glass of juice.

More guava coming on.

It’s always such a thrill to consume your own home-grown produce.

tinga_3Back to football, recently one of the Brazilian players suffered racial abuse in Peru.

Every time he got possession of the ball there were monkey noises from the stands.

Now, I am not in favor of this at all, but I wonder if his massive dreadlocks didn’t exacerbate the situation.

Personally, I hate dreadlocks, they are unkempt and look dirty and disgusting and I wonder if they are appropriate for people representing sports and their country. Whatever I think of dreadlocks, wouldn’t prompt me to express it in the form of racism.

My mouse is stuffed. Can’t control the wheel; very frustrating.

10Malhação-Fernanda-Vasconcellos50-500x357Prices in Brazil, particularly in Rio, have become ridiculous. And there have appeared “Surreal” banknotes based on the official Real as a protest.

Surreal, depticing, who else, but Salvador Dali, the master of surrealism.

On the eve of the FIFA World Cup and Confederations Cup, prices have shot up in restaurants, on the beach and all manner of venues. There are sites on the net encouraging people to boycott such places. For example, a picolé (popsicle) on the beach used to be the same price as on the street; now it’s R$1.50 on the street and R$4 on the beach. Even the rental of beach chairs and umbrellas on the beach are ridiculous. Now to take a family to the beach for the day can cost upwards of R$100. People are being encouraged to bring food and drink from home. One report on TV last week showed a restaurant charging R$99 for a shrimp omelette and R$11 for a glass of juice; the omelette had four shrimp, and the fruit for a glass of juice costs about r$1. Pure rip offs. The Carioca are getting greedy.

Is it time for a nap? Oh, come on, it must be.





bellosToscanaYesterday morning’s breakfast at the botequim

Cold roast pork sandwiches, washed down with the remains of the bottle of Italian Bellosguardo Rosso Toscana while nibbling on offered BBQ’d pieces and chicken wings from the BBQ that was in progress.

Does that sound debauched?

I don’t care really about your opinion, it was a rhetorical question after all. My opinion… was yummy!

What a wonderful way to begin a sunny Sunday when there was not a lot else going on.

The fregües (regulars) at the botequim are often bemused by my antics, none the less yesterday. Noises like, “O AV sabe como vivir” (AV knows how to live) and “Ele  não beba vinhos ruins” (He doesn’t drink plonk” were amongst those to be heard.

Of course, I offered them to share my wine, but Brazilians don’t generally drink dry wines, and this was a tart cab sav.


Looks so damned innocent, just bit the hand that feeds me…

Lixo bit me. Yes, the first time he has drawn blood. Sitting in the praça on Saturday night, he jumped up on to the bench for a pet, as he is want to do then he lay down and sunk his teeth into my left wrist.

Once I managed to wrest my wrist from the fangs of the demon feline monster, I became the loving devoted father when faced with an errant son and gave him a sound cuff under the ear and went home nursing my ego as much as my bleeding wrist.

After breakfast yesterday, I found an amazing creature. I found a caterpillar. Now normally caterpillars are cutesy things and don’t usually warrant much attention, but this one did. I stood transfixed as this beast gnawed his way through the leaves on my goiaba branca (white guava) tree like a combine harvester.

Mean green leaf eating machine

Apparently he is the caterpillar of one of the many hawk moth species; a fact that google assures me is a high probability.

An amazing 4+inches of green destruction. Big enough that he could have gone on the BBQ grill as a green sausage.

He’s still there this morning gnawing away happily when I put trimmings out on the compost.

I am leaving him to wend his trail of destruction because I am curious, I hope to catch him during his metamorphosis from the Hulk to elegance.

I am also hoping to capture the process on film… Now there’s a point, in the past you ‘captured something on film’ but today there is no film. The last roll of Kodak has come and gone; should we not change that ‘to capture him on a chip’? Do we now ‘SD’ something rather than ‘film’ it?

You see the problem with the language now? The problems that I face being grammar police’? Is ‘capturing something on film’ going to remain with us as one of those linguistic dinosaurs?



Problems beset us daily, riddles, enigmas and conundra. Things that cause us to stop and think or worry about. Many of them seem inconsequential, but they all are a part of us, our lives.

Take my comment above, for example. ‘The caterpillar was happily gnawing…’ Do caterpillars really feel ‘happy’ when they are wreaking such havoc? Do caterpillars have emotions? Does he ask stupid questions like man, ‘why am I here?’ There is just so much that you won’t find on Wikipedia.

If we stop thinking we are screwed. If we think about them too much, we are screwed.

It’s Monday, whatever we do today, at some stage we will be screwed.

So much screwing going on, I think it It is time for more coffee.


I meant to, I really did…

coffeephilosophyI had the new post page open nearly all afternoon and had already selected the opening image, but didn’t get round to doing it.

Now I am running on coffee and making this the first post of the day.

I got to the supermarket yesterday and two more bottles of wine fell into the shopping cart. I just don’t understand how that happens.

Lately I have been getting so confused. Life used to be so simple when I had only one pair of shoes. Now I have two. Yes, I bought another pair. In the past I have always bought the next pair when the old pair fell off my feet; I believe in getting that extra mile. But I surpassed myself this time round.

When I had one pair, I always knew where they were; on my feet or on the base of the fan beside my PC when I wore my chinelos (flip flops). If they were on my feet, then my chinelos were waiting in front of my PC chair ready for me to slip into when I came home because I never wear shoes at home.

Now I have two pair and I can never find both of either pair at the same time… so confusing.

My one student today has cancelled. My weekend has started.

coffeesanityI could wash the dishes, I could put some wine in the fridge, I could sweep the yard, I could water my plants, I could take the rubbish out, I could get another coffee, then ponder which of these things I may or may not do. Life is so full of decisions. Decisions cause stress, and stress is the biggest killer; so it’s better not to make decisions, therefore no stress.

I found an apt description of the internet the other day. One that shows that humanity has not changed one iota in the past 4,000 or so years.


Despite our greater levels of technology, it’s true, we still write on walls and worship cats. We just do it faster.

goiabatreeMy goiaba (guava) tree is growing great. Four years and this year I am watching hopefully for flower buds.

Fresh goiaba juice is wonderful. Much better than the chemically standardised crap you buy in boxes in the supermarket.

I read an article sometime ago about how they get orange juice to always taste the same; they pluck it, they squeeze it, they concentrate it, they stuff it with chemicals, they dilute it, they sweeten it  and box it. Then they have the audacity to call it ‘natural’, what a load of bollocks, it’s false advertising. If they do it to oranges, they do it to all fruit.

I stopped buying boxed crap after reading that. I buy real fruit from the sacolão (fruit & vege shop) and do it the hard way, yes, I used a blender and don’t add sugar. More people should be doing this, much healthier, much tastier.

Blogging right along.


Help! I’ve lost my pencil…

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