Tag Archive: inspiration


3am & Coffee

starterfluidIt usually works. The combination does strange things to one’s mind.

But I just sat there reading the news, checking comments and reading new posts waiting for inspiration to kick in.

Now it’s nearly 6am and nary a nueron has moved.

Thunder in the background and the patter of rain.

The lull before the storm. No not the weather, today is a nothing day, tomorrow I have a shitload to do to prepare for BBQ (the storm). Mainly trip to supermarket to buy dead cow. I have all the pork I need, I am lacking rump steak, liver, chicken hearts, bread rolls for the garlic bread. I might get a slab salmon to grill with capers, if I can find some at a good price.

Yesterday I harvested my chilies off two bushes. I have to pick them over and bottle them in olive oil today.

bowlofchilies

Lots of chilies

Last night I was determined to go to bed with no dishes waiting to stare me down in the morning. FAIL! I decided to make a bread ‘n butter pudding for comfort food to watch the football. Needed comforting, Flamengo were down 2-0 near the end of the game, so I flicked off the TV and went to bed.

*Gazes around room wondering what’s next?*

A comment on another of my blogs yeaterday asked what a praça was.

This is our praça, doesn’t look much, but it’s our green space. My house is just behind me.

So, I went back to bed…

…and got up again.

hello_kitty001

Hello Kitty

I had to make coffee. My world has been destroyed!

Hello Kitty is NOT a cat!

It’s true, it’s headline news.

“She is a little girl. She is a friend. But she is not a cat.

“She’s never depicted on all fours. She walks and sits like a two-legged creature.

“She does have a pet cat of her own, however, and it’s called Charmmy Kitty.”BBCNews

This is shocking!

I had a cat named Hello Kitty. She was given to us by close neighbours. As soon as Ellen Suelen, my six-year-old stepdaughter, saw the kitten she exclaimed, “Ooh, Hello Kitty!” and that was that, despite the fact that the cat was not pink.

Hello Kitty at the laundry bar

Hello Kitty at the laundry bar

HK was with us for four years and had two lots of kittens. So, yes, for us Hello Kitty was a cat.

I did do some posting in the wee small hours, but I still have five blogs to go, so I must blog along.

Later

 

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5 Must do Blogging Tips

Once again, I have visited a blog that espouses ‘blogging tips’.

There are thousands, nay probably millions, of blogs and blogs with posts about blogging tips. And, the surprising this is they ll seem to get plenty of readers, likes and follows.

I can’t see why I shouldn’t join the madding crowd.

And I look forward to having lots of wonderful comments, visitors and likes too.

Five Tips to Ensure your Blogivity.

Blogging Tip #1

coffee-cigarettes_00387047Coffee, one cannot blog or write descent material without having decent coffee at hand. Coffee and the by necessity cigarette are essential blogging tools. If your posts lack that essential caffeine hint, then sadly your blog will fail.

The coffee needs to be real coffee; instant or Starbucks will not cut the mustard and will result in mediocre posts.

catswim

A pussy is a must, if it’s a wet pussy, so much the better

Blogging Tip #2

Pussy!

You’re blog must have the quintessential cat.

It may be your cat, it can be a LOL Cat, all the better.

It can even be a scraggy moggy found while trolling the blogosphere.

The cat may be neurotic, or one offering philosophical advice; but the bottom line is it must have a cat.

A giant duck has nothing to do with this post

A giant duck has nothing to do with this post

Blogging Tip #3

Whatever your post is about, there must be an image of some description.

Blog posts that are just text are boring.

The image may/may not be related to the post, but it must be linked in some way.

Images should be spaced alternatively, or people will think you are just taking the mickey.

If you don’t have an image, people may think you are quackers or the type of person who plays with a rubber ducky in the bath, which, by the way proves that you are quackers.

A fairy in a jar, is often helpful, if you can find one at the bottom of the garden

A fairy in a jar, is often helpful, if you can find one at the bottom of the garden

Blogging Tip #4

Know your audience, target your posts to your audience. Once you have got a visitor you must keep them captured, enraptured and literally trussed up in what you have to say, or indeed not say.

You don’t have to be as charismatic as that Biblical fellow, but he does have a lot of followers (he must have good SEO).

But once you’ve captured your audience, you have to give them something worthwhile, or not, to keep them entranced.

A sure-fire way to keep your audience, is post regularly and often. And write your posts ‘off the cuff’; don’t plan them. Planned posts often come across as bullshit and the world has enough of that already.

Don’t forget to communicate; if your visitor leaves a comment, acknowledge it, appreciate it, thank them. If you can’t think of anything to say, just 🙂

Rather sterile, but it may work

Rather sterile, but it may work

Blogging Tip # 5

SEO – you must know your SEO. Sex, Enigma and One can of inspiration. If you are not inspired, your readers will know. Therefore you keep them spell-bound with sex and the extraordinary. That other stuff about search engines not finding your material is superfluous. If you have Sex, Enigma and One can of inspiration,  you will be found.

Some people prefer to have an inspiration key fitted to their keyboard. That’s all very well, but it doesn’t give the same gratification as opening a can and dipping your finger in; it’s a bit like that Nutella feeling, gooey but nice.

Every bloggers' dream

Every bloggers’ dream

Blogging Tip #6

Be inconsistent, eclectic, keep people guessing.

Tell them one thing and do another, like have a sixth blogging tip when you promised five.

Don’t just dream to be out for lunch, go the whole hog and go viral.

Summary

My pearls maybe wisdom, maybe not, you may get more readers, maybe not, but you will have the satisfaction of blogging. You deserve another coffee.

NB: Some of the above is not nonsense, most of it is.

Remember, when in doubt 🙂

It Must be a Secret

All points of the blogosphere

All points of the blogosphere

I have found the perfect shop.

During my blogging, which started in 2004, I have been to all points of the blogosphere.

From being lost to bewildered.

Sometimes the hardest thing to find is inspiration, I’ve tried canned inspiration, I’ve tried pretty purple pills, but often to no avail. The effects are more like placebos, they work a little or they taste just like sugar.

But, yesterday I found the perfect shop.

Inspiration2

The Holy Grail for Bloggers

I have no idea where the shop is, there was no address.

So, if you think you’re getting a post today, LOL forget it 🙂

I’m off on my quest.

Right after lunch, my tummy is rumbling.

Ectra strong, just made for quests

Extra strong, just made for quests

And I have to make a thermos of coffee to take, and some of yesterdays meatloaf, it was delicious….

Oh, I’ve got a new coffee. Well, it’s an old coffee but they’ve made an Extra Forte (extra strong) version. I had my first taste this morning.

The verdict is that it’s rather yummy.

Just the thing a blogger needs when he is in search of the Bloggy Grail.

One needs to be prepared, because these questy things can be tricky. You know, you might meet knights, or trolls, flying carpets and dragons. You might even meet that supreme horror, the Taxman!

Dangers lurk at every turn.

Yesterday, I completed the download of a movie. Puss ‘n Boots, you know, the one from Shrek. I was checking to make sure I had an English version, I did; and I got sort of involved and watched the whole thing. Now it may be a kids movie, but I thought it was just great. A fantastic way to spend a Sunday afternoon in which not a lot was happening.

Speaking of Puss, I mentioned sometime ago that when I close the door and tell Clorinha that I’m off to the pub, she’s out the gate before me. If you don’t believe me, here’s the proof; even if she does stop for a tinkle on the way.

.

There you have it, tinkle and all.

Oh, the car isn’t mine. I am truly an impoverished English teacher. That’s the neighbour’s car who rent my carport.

Now, about the questy thing. The clouds have come over, I think I’ll stay at home and drink more coffee, one can’t just go rushing off willy nilly looking for the Bloggy Grail, it’ll still be there tomorrow.

The Bloggy Grail

The Bloggy Grail

Later.

Have you got a Dorgie?

No, that’s not doggy spelled wrong, or said being posh.

Basically, a Dorgie is a Corgie with withered legs.

The Queen breeds them, apparently.

A dorgie is a corgie with truncated legs

A Dorgie is a Corgi with truncated legs

In his book Dogs, Desmond Morris reports that the secretary of the Kennel Club at the time commented: “The Dachshund was evolved to chase badgers down holes and Corgis to round up cattle. If anyone loses a herd of cattle down a badger hole, these are just the dogs to get them out.”

I’ll remember that if a herd of cattle ever read Alice in Wonderland…

Apparently, today is Happy Oceans Day.

happyoceansday

Considering how we have polluted and abused them, I can’t imagine that there’d be many at the party.

broken-pencilI just scratched my back with a good pencil, like I have done many times before.

It snapped in two, now I have two back scratchers pencils.

It was a clean break, no surgery required, it was pointless.

The mayor of Rio has finally admitted that Guanabara Bay will not be depolluted and clean before the Olympics in 2016.

    The place is a bloody sewer, 10m litres of sewerage each day - image: Globo

The place is a bloody sewer, 10m litres of sewerage each day – image: Globo

To even think that it was possible is impossible.

He stated that there is no problem, no health danger.

What a load of bullshit!

Any contact with raw sewerage poses a health risk.

Rio should never have been awarded the games on this promise.

Maybe I'll have to resort to pills again

Maybe I’ll have to resort to pills again

Beautiful sunny day out there, the washing is on the line, blogging is almost done, one more to go; and I have absolutely no idea what to post about on Tomus at the moment.

*Waits for inspiration to strike*

As I finally got to the supermarket yesterday, there are a number of options for lunch, pork leg chop, T-bone, or I might disembowel some sausages and mix the guts with some mincemeat and make a meat loaf. I may also destroy some synapses to repair in the night. I didn’t destroy enough last night, only had one bottle of beer and a Kiwi liqueur.

But first, a nap, I need to keep my Nap-fu skills finely honed. Clorinha is practising hers.

My back scratcher doesn’t reach any more.

Later.

SLEEP-KEY*Hits ctrl+alt+sleep key*

Deleted – Defeated

I have been deleting video clips of my floor.

I tried, I truly did, to get a little film of Clorinha doing her mad dash through the room, under the chair, on to the box, on to the shelf, on to the other box, out of the window and on to the stove in the carport. But I failed. Each time I was left with the camera still pointing at an empty space on the floor and she was already outside.

ClorinhaintheBox2

Clorinha playing after her victory

I have been defeated by a small furry feline.

It’s the same when I try to get a video of Destructocat trying to demolish my passion fruit vines. I go to get the camera and when I get back she just sits there like a film star… looking pretty.

It’s Monday, my day has already been ruined.

I went to bed earlier than early last night. Early is between 9pm and 10pm; earlier than early, is before 9pm. I was woken twice by strange noises outside. Probably noises that I hear every night when the praça is alive and don’t even notice when I am awake, but they sound deadly when I am asleep. So I was up again just after 11, writing a post after having been inspiraficated in my sleep. Then I ran out of steam and went back to bed, hoping for more insprification. Instead, I went to sleep until the neighbour got his car out. Once he had gone, I died again. Now it is 10am and I am running late. I never did finish that post, I saved it and began my normal blogging routine. This is No. 3 this morning and all on one cup of coffee.

comments-iconA comment two posts back surprised me: “I try not to miss one episode of your TV drama life!”

To which I replied: “I have never considered my life as a TV drama, for me it’s far too mundane. But I thank you.”

Wow, my life is like a TV drama. I never thought of it that way before. I’ve always considered it just living, maybe a bit eclectically, maybe a touch of the exotic living here in Brazil, tinged with madness and the unexpected, along with a lot of coffee and weird tastes. I sit here each day surrounded by my wine and the conglomeration that I call home, posting and being attacked by a demented kitten, and somebody finds that exciting.

It’s nice to know that my efforts are not wasted.

I am a niche market.

I have an urge. I didn’t really have dinner last night. A fact that my stomach keeps reminding me of. I feel like hotdogs in a homemade tomato sauce on toast. By the time I finish this post, I’ll do it. Then, it’ll be lunch time and I can kill two birds with one stone.

The Pope has blamed the Syrian conflict on arms manufacturers. Indirectly, I guess he means the USA and Russia.

He also slid sneakily into the West Bank without going through Israel acknowledging that Palestine exists. I wonder if he can do the impossible and break the impasse between Palestine and Israel. While I am not a Catholic and think the Papacy should be dismantled, I like this Pope. He has done more for humanity than all previous popes put together.

American Congress is going to revisit gun control. Here we go again, barking up the wrong tree. Try looking at the root of the problem; mental health and the drugs pushed by BigPharma. Until you get to the root of the problem, you’ll have mass shootings like California this week.

I have run out of steam again.

Time for hotdogs.

Later.

 

Wanting for a Title

allpurposeinspirationIt’s true, despite four coffees. I can’t think of a title.

I’ll have to get another of those cans of All-Purpose Inspiration next time at the supermarket.

I read one of the stupidest things yesterday. Referring to help for prisoners to stop re-offending.  This is the stupid thinking of politicians (and society, I might add). The help needs to be before they ever get to prison. Once they get to prison, in the majority of cases, it’s too damned late.

Another political stupidity, food banks, David Cameron praising food banks for the work they do. If the government was doing its job there wouldn’t be a need for food banks!

Catch 22. A Christian was sacked for berating homosexuals by saying that the Bible says homosexuality is an abomination. The Christian was sacked  for homosexual discrimination. In turn the Christian is now claiming religious discrimination… and so the wheel turns.

Now, I put it to you that Christianity is a learned behaviour… therefore possibly unnatural. Homosexuality is not, but rather genetic. Think about that.

My list of things to do today is complete when I finish this post.

nothinglist

Should be successful

The rest of the day should go smoothly.

Lunch will be leftover mustard mince on toast. Yesterday’s lunch was mustard mince and chips, which was better than the reheated pepperoni pizza from Friday.

What lavish feast did you have on Good Friday?

Most Brazilians have fish. Salted cod is the choice. Personally I can’t stand the stuff, unless it is bolas de bacalhão (Cod balls), they’re quite tasty and go well with beer.

blosdabacalhao

bolas de bacalhão

Sometimes Raimundo makes them at the botequim.

Now, I do believe I feel a nap coming on…

my-bed

Later.

 

Still Doped Up

27-funny-ironic-irony-picturesYes, I’m still on the paracetamol. It’s Monday here, normally Monday is my dentist’s day, but being Monday it’s a public holiday today, so he’s closed.

He opens again on Wednesday.

Yes, today is a holiday in Rio state. The patron saint of Rio is São Sebastião, so we are celebrating… me with no beer. My one planned student for the week also has lessons on Monday, guess what? It’s a public holiday, no lesson. Mondays are set to try our patience.

mondays-stink-side-view

Yes, Mondays stink

I’ve been sitting here playing with my mental blocks because being Monday I have no idea what to write, yet.

Sole fillets are out of the freezer, they should be ready for mid-afternoon. Of course, being Monday I only discovered that there was no food for lunch at 11:30.

I should be doing useful things, like the dishes so I can make more dishes to wash after lunch.

I should be watering the plants because they’re wilting in the heat. I’ll go and do that while I’m thinking…

Plants are now unwilting.

No inspirational flash…

screensplashI am waiting for something amazing to leap out of the screen, spur my imagination, set the wheels in motion for a brilliant post; but all I got were gritty feet when I splashed water on them while outside.

Maybe I should just give up and do the sensible thing… have a nap until the fish has defrosted.

Later.

Getting a Head Start Today

Not wanting to take the risk of a pathetic apology at 11pm, I have taken the chance, through a lull in inspiration, to make a morning post.

No BBQ today, meat’s all gone, but there remains much beer at the botequim, which could well be an option later.

pills1Eating my meat yesterday, I happened to chew on the tooth that was seen to last week, and it has given me gripe ever since. A paracetamol twice during the night, one more for breakfast, and I need another now. I am not normally a member of the ‘pop-a-pill’ brigade, but the intense dull throb is unbearable; if someone offered me a cyanide pill at the moment, I would seriously consider it.

I wonder if BBQed pills work?

So, I am going to be a ball of fun for the day; especially if I can’t have a beer because of the damned pills.

The sun is out, it is going to be hotter than yesterday.

I couldn’t believe what I read last night on The Guardian newsUK storms are divine retribution for gay marriage laws, says Ukip councillor. What an idiot! I never thought that a statement like this would be made by an Englishman; Americans yes, I would consider that par for the course, but an Englishman, I am truly dismayed. This councillor should be surgically removed from his post and given a frontal lobotomy with a gay scalpel. Stupid arsehole!

This morning I read another strange idea. ‘Someone has worked out how to charge people for sitting down. Which is to say, a demonstration of capitalism in its purest form’, also on The Guardian news. The coffee and wi-fi are free…

gollumcoffee_1313_77_lHonestly, the world is becoming sadder by the minute.

I will just sit here (free) in my little coffee-sodden world and shake my head in disbelief.

Later.

Hole in the Wall

Brick-Wall-550x355There’s a hole in the wall, I can see some inspiration.

Given that its Monday, so far all has gone well.

Remember that trip to the supermarket that I was promising myself that I would do Friday, then Saturday…. and Sunday; well, I finally did it this morning. Got lots of meat, now I have to have a BBQ to justify it. My plans to go to the supermarket was mainly that milk was on special Fri, Sat & Sun. I was pleasantly suprised they hadn’t changed the price tags, it was still R$1.99 a litre, normal price last week was R$3,29, so that made me a happy camper.

There’s not actually a lot going on that I can write about, inspiration or not.

For those who feel their alcohol consumption is somewhat excessive and want to drink in moderation, I think I have found the answer….

moderationpub

There, isn’t that just wonderful? <—– Rhetorical question.

France is in the spotlight this week. First it all but damaged the Iran talks, but in the end it was Iran who backed out. Second they are trying to eradicate prostitution by fining the clients. Talk about pushing shit up hill with a rake. If you want to eradicate prostitution the answer is simple, ban marriage; as long as we have marriage, we’ll have prostitutes. Idiots!

Personally, I don’t care. Not because I am no longer married, but I find the whole aspect of paying for sex abhorrent. I did have sex with a prostitute on several occasions a few years ago, but we were friends and drinking buddies; no cash changed hands. If I had to pay for sex, I honestly don’t think I could get ‘it’ up.

I read about a strange phenomenon yesterday. Kissing my teeth, How the hell do you kiss your teeth? I simply had to click and have a look. I still don’t fully understand it, but the act is associated with showing contempt. It originates with African and Caribbean cultures, and is so serious that doing it in front of  police could get you arrested. You can read about on The Guardian.

You see, you can learn something everyday. There is no point in life when learning stops.

Now it’s getting on in the afternoon and I have to go teaching, English, not about kissing ones teeth.

Later.

 

Ran into a Brick Wall

Brick-WallThe alternative title for this post is It’s Been a Mucky Day.

I woke had three coffees, blogged a littled, four posts, and had a nap because my inspiration had run into a brick wall.

Woke again at 11:15 and decided it was breakfast time. So, bacon, two sausages, three eggs and stewed tomatoes; a good English breakfast. And it’s midday Sitting here pondering with a glass of sparkling mineral water to quench my thirst… Overdosed on sodium.

I had an early class, but the coordinator never confirmed it, so I didn’t have an early class. I stayed home. The last two, and I might add the first two classes with this student, she never arrived. I wasn’t going to get all gussied up, go all the way to the factory for more of the same.

zoom-um-real-462There’s a one real coin on the floor in the doorway; it dropped out of my pocket last night. I have stepped over it, and restepped over it several time this morning. I may, or indeed, may not eventually pick it up. That depends on my inclination or abject procrastination, or simply that I have nothing better to do. This is an indication of the level of importance that things take around here.

If I was to worry about it, that would create stress, I don’t like stress, so I don’t worry, be happy. Good advice.

The spy chiefs in Britain are squealing like stuck pigs that the internet spying on emails, etc is of vital importance to the security of the nation. Bollocks, they’re squealing because they want to keep their high paying jobs; and any curtailing by the government could mean that some of them lose them. Apparently, the British spying is worse than their American partners in crime. They are citing 34 terror plots have been curtailed because of their spying, cite them! Their  American cronies said the same, turned out they couldn’t specify ONE! They are saying that they defend freedom, yes, by curtailing it.

Putin, is trying to pass a law that demands more use of the Russian flag and anthem to generate patriotism. More bullshit! Patriotism is generated by the people, not the president. You try to instil patriotism and you get backlash from the fan. The president will only succeed in making people hate him even more than they do now.

The length some of these despot leader go to to assert their will. The people don’t want their will, they want representation for the people’s will. If you don’t represent the people, then you’re simply a dictator.

Just checked the brick wall, it’s still there.

Last night I arrived home and found that someone had chucked out a kitchen cabinet for the rubbish collection, I grabbed the small unit, and it is now my tool box in the garage. The larger upper part has become my glass cabinet above the TV, so it’s missing a glass panel, it looks okay, it’s serviceable. The bigger bottom part wasn’t in the best condition, besides it was too heavy for my to move by myself.

I am a scavenger, if I can find something that is useful, I take it home and use it. The complete unit, when new, would have had a value of R$700. As far as I am concerned, that’s R$700 in the bank.

It hasn’t rained so far today, but there are ominous black clouds on the horizon, so it could well rain heavily about the time I need to walk to work. Wouldn’t that be like a Monday?

Later, I’ll leave with a thought…

todaysaidpiglet

Oh, and that coin, it’s still there.

 

 

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