Tag Archive: onion rings

The Dirty Truth

The dirty truth

The dirty truth

I am feeling paranoid.

After yesterday’s intro photo, I’m deeply concerned petrified that you all may think that was my kitchen.

So I decided to show you the dirty truth.

That’s about as bad as it gets.

I fixed the Simon and Garfunkel video clip on the older post yesterday; it’s got words now.

I was aked if I would post the recipe for my onion rings. I replied “yes!”

It’s so simple.

Onion rings don’t have a recipe, you just do it.

justdoitNormal family serving, about 5 tbsp plain flour, one egg, milk to make a batter, I sometimes add chopped parsley to the batter, or add it to the onion before battering. Cut onion separate into rings dip in batter, let drip, and chuck it in the deep fry. Turn and when golden, take them out and eat.

How simple is that?

When I do them, I’m on auto pilot… I think more when I’m peeing.

Yesterday I made a roasting dish full, that was double the batter and four medium onions.

I thought about taking a photo, but I figured, nah, nobody really wants to know about onion rings…

Want a shock?

Oh, come on... that's a finger!

Oh, come on… that’s a finger!

Now they have lab-grown penises…

First it was ears on a rat and a finger on a stomach, then they jump straight to penises. What’s next? Today’s special at Walmart, fresh penises!

You didn’t really think I would post a penis…

Bet that got you going.

84% in Britain think that the war against drugs is lost.

Oh, really? That’s been my opinion for twenty years. Many are of the opinion that drugs should be decriminalised and moved from criminal to a health issue.

How slow we are to accept the truth.

Brazil goes to the polls today. All forms of politcal advertising have been banned from yesterday… I was handed my first pamphlet at the gate before 8am. It looks like the incumbent blonde bimbo will come out tops again, after Marina took a dive in the polls and is neck ‘n necking with the previous third place getter. It appears as though the blonde bimbo doesn’t have enough support for an outright win (50% + 1 vote), which means another three weeks of politcal bullshit as the two top pollers go to a run-off on 26th.

Brazilians have a warped view of who is suitable for office. For example…


Wolverine – vote for he who has claws

This is how you advertise your candidacy for city councillor.

Pathetic. The circus gets worse as the office gets higher.

Illegal aliens taking our jobs

Illegal aliens taking our jobs

Thank heavens I’m not involved in this circus. One of the advantages of being an illegal alien.

Latvia is going to the polls as well. The Latvians are pooping their pants as the popular choice is pro-Russian who has refused to speak against the Russian annexation of Crimea. Latvia has a large population of Russians and fears that the same may happen by being in effect invited by the new president.

Why can’t all these Russians who live in ex-Soviet sattelites just freakin’ well go home? Even if they were born there, emigrate if they think that Putinland is so freakin’ wonderful.

Looks like the laundry lady isn’t coming today.  We discussed this last week because she has to go to another part of the city to vote, and agreed that if she couldn’t come today, then tomorrow is okay.

I don’t need to go to the supermarket yet. I have coffee for before noon, and beer for the afternoon. I also have salsichão should the need to eat arise.

Salsichão are big salsichas

Salsichão are big salsichas

I may boil them, grill them, BBQ them, batter and deep fry them.  I haven’t made that decision yet. I need to ponder the issue during my Nap-fu practice.


Willy or Wonty

My kitchen didn't look like this... quite

My kitchen didn’t look like this… quite

I bet you’re all wondering, willy or wonty?

I nearly didn’t.

I would have posted this morning, but as you all know I have lessons now on Saturday mornings, which just screws up the whole day.

Between 10pm Friday and 8am Saturday I have a whole ten hours free, most of which I spend sleeping, or at least trying to sleep, or peeing.

The remaining two hours doesn’t leave a lot of room for something blogworthy to happen.

So I did the dishes.

Awesome machine.... want one

Awesome machine…. want one!

I got home at nearly 2pm, resisting the call of the botequim and flopped. Yes, time for Nap-fu practice. I excelled

I woke about 3:30 and knowing there was a birthday party at my neighbours to which I was invited. I made a large batch of battered onion rings and toddled off next door. Besides, I wanted to see his new BBQ in action.

It’s not real brick, just a brick-like cladding over concrete, but it does the job.

The trouble is the price… R$700 which is about $300+ too much for me.

Lots of people; mainly neighbours whom I knew and many of his family whom I knew from previous BBQs.

The birthday boy’s mother was there. She was the lovely toothless old soul who, at the last BBQ, tried some of the R$50/bottle wine I had taken along, promptly spat it out on the floor and announced that it was vinegar.

It was a wonderful Merlot. When it comes to wines Brazilians generally like R$3/bottle sweet plonk. The country will never make the first world.

I didn’t take wine this time, that’s why I made the onion rings; I never go to an invite empty-handed. How crass?

Beer chillers

Beer chillers

There was lots of beer, so no problem. Now while Lincoln had a new BBQ, his beer chiller wasn’t quite so classy, but it did a grand job.

They have just painted the exterior of the house, one of the chillers was the paint barrel, the other an old, but slightly more respectable, polystyrene ice box without a lid. Which is just as well, because the speed at which it would have been lifted for beers would have melted the damned thing.

I didn’t stay long, because there was a chilling wind blowing through and as darkness approached, I made my exit, gracefully. Well, as gracefully as I could hobbling down the steep stairs on a walking stick with each footfall on the tiles threatening to send me express mail to the bottom where I was swamped by the kids, “Got any more of those ring things?” Praise indeed coming from the lower echelons of the family tree.

So, the answer to the question, “Willy or Wonty?”

I diddly!

Now it’s bedtime.


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