Tag Archive: stats


Селфи

I finally discovered that selfies are a threat. One of my highly esteemed visitors here posted a selfie on his blog. Lenny, just because I did…

Putin' selfies on the net

Putin’ selfies on the net

Not only that; they’re spreading across the world, even Putinland has the ubiquitous selfie = Селфи. But then he deserves them.

Selfies are the peak of vanity, they are horrible, having that arm extended… I truly wonder what we’ll come up with next.

It’s 5am, BTW. I have been up three times already, this time I made coffee, giving in to insomnia.

likeable-blog-20-2x

Off with a hiss and a roar.

My new blog has received various accolades from WordPress, my rats are stattling along. I am surprised, as this is the fastest that any of my blogs has begun. First, 5 likes, then 10, now 20 and this is only the beginning of the third day.

Even God hadn’t got this far on the third day; he was still adding widgets.

.

Now there’s a modern version of creationism.

First God created a blog, he saw that it was good. On the second day he changed the theme to a WordPress light and added an app called firmament…. And on the sixth day he added the Adam widget, and then the Eve widget; which got a virus called Snake which in turn gave the world Apple, apple_logoand the world has never been the same since. On the seventh day God rested and received accolades from WordPress.

I see that Apple is in the poop, deep in the poop. I read a paper yesterday that discloses Apple has imbedded invasive codes into ALL its products, that do nefarious things like giving ALL your personal data, by passing passwords, to third parties. The rot is so deep that there are calls for a thorough criminal investigation and charges against all mid level and top level company executives. The scenario is so bad that it pales NSA into oblivion, apparently.

Another one bites the dust…

Oh, you don’t believe me, then have a read: The Internet of Things. It’s quite scary.

Fist bumps

Fist bumps

Fist bumps.

WTF is with this fist bumps?

I refuse to acknowledge fist bumps. I shake hands.

This fist bumps shit, to me, is a sign of aggression, it stems from gangs, it symbolises ‘yo dawg’.

Whereas a solid handshake is gentlemanly, warmth, solidarity.

Now they’re telling us fist bumps are healthier…

My upbringing says shake hands

My upbringing says shake hands

So I wash my hands and shake hands; or I work elbow deep in shit and fist bump, that’s healthier?

Not in my book.

Don’t thrust your fist bumping at me, if you don’t want to shake hands like a man, fine; just don’t expect a conversation.

Fist bumping is rife here in Brazil, but friends still shake hands.

It’s now 6am, I can see some Nap-fu practise coming up.

Later.

 

Careful!

coffeewarningI still looking for my Prozac…

Until I find it, walk slowly back and make no sudden moves.

I don’t actually take that shit, but I needed a cutesy opening line.

I have had my first coffee and being near lunchtime I am about four short of my requirements.

My students arrived before I could pour the second, then I got tangled up reading the news on BBC, then I googled political satire that kept me amused for more than an hour. The remarkable thing about political satire is that it should be ‘political truths’. You can se a sample of what I found on Shit Happens today. Do you like oxymorons? Try this one: honest politicians.

Still no sign of my Mean Green Leaf Eating Machine, however the deforestation in my garden has stopped.

This is my last blog post for the day, I have completed the other seven. Now it seems as if there is no purpose in the rest of the day. I could cancel the afternoon and move straight into Sunday, but beer or wine could also be an attractive option to get over my winexiety. Lunch today, leftovers from yesterday, I’ll spice it up with some cracked black peppercorns.

Brazilians love anything American, Wrangler jeans, music, all sorts of stuff. Now they are following American manufacturing tactics. Big engineering firm here that makes parts for export to America has just moved their manufacturing plant to South Korea where they can make the same part for less than half the cost to compete with the Chinese. Now it’s Brazilian jobs going overseas, just like American jobs.

My stats are continuing to fall. Yes, I know I am whining, but look at this, Nether Region stats from the beginning when I left Blogspot in Sep 2011.

statsNRLook at that dip in November last year and the plummet from February  (26th) this year. This is the trend on all my blogs, not just one. There’s something screwy going on. I am convinced that I have been sabotaged somewhere along the line.

I work hard to produce my blogs and when I see this, it shatters my confidence totally. I know I am not imagining things, it’s not because the world has suddenly lost its sense of humour (Nether Region is a humour blog), or that cooking and drinking have gone out of fashion; even this blog with 100++ visitors a day, now only gets a max of 30. Six of my blogs got 1,000+ visitors a month, now only 2 of them manage to scrape over the finish line. “There’s something rotten in Denmark,” (I didn’t pick the country, William Shakespeare did).

It’s like my blogs are invisible, with the exception of my regular visitors.

Second coffee down, time for lunch.

Later.

Side Tracked

adogpeewaterbowlThat’s why I didn’t post yesterday.

I found a new meme.

A philosophical Labrador.

It cost me almost the entire afternoon, but then you understand, dear blogger, how easy it is to get sidetracked.

I post Foul Bachelor Frog on my Nether Region each Tuesday, and Philosoraptor on my Genes on a Phriday; I’m wondering where I can post the Dog Philosopher.

The Pope has all but gone, bombs are going off everywhere, asteroids and meteors have been causing havoc, the Moonies have had a mass wedding of thousands… how utterly absurd. The world is in bad shape.

Me? I am well coffeed this morning, I have posted on all my blogs. I am still worried about the drastic fall in visitors since 26th Jan, something happened/is happening. New visitors just don’t stop for no reason, and when I say drastic fall, I mean drastic. My five best blogs visitors have fallen to 20%. Fizz and Nether Region were getting nearly 200 hits daily, now struggling to get 40. The fall happened overnight. Something changed, it’s almost like my blogs have fallen off the blogosphere. After my experience with Google, my faith in the blogosphere’s impartiality was not left entirely intact. Yes, I’m a cynical suspicious bastard.

Having said that, I thank all my regular visitors for their loyalty and regular Likes and Comments, I appreciate it all immensely.

We have returned to hot hot weather. Yesterday, my private students came for their class 12:00 – 14:00 (that’s noon – 2pm for our American cousins who only have watches that go to 12); we got a bar table and sat in the shade of leafy tree in the park. My head, remember my hair colour is ‘bald’, got sunburnt. It was quite tender and delayed any previous thoughts of a hair cut. So I remain hairy.

I am seriously considering another ‘dead cow’ experience. I have pig parts in the freezer, but lunchtime is not the ideal time to think about thawing them out. The other problem that I am faced with is that both my pairs of shorts have just been washed and are wet on the clothesline. It’s too hot to wear jeans; and while it’s acceptable to wander around the house in my underpants, I imagine a classy restaurant would take a dim view.

Later.

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